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This site is the website of motivational speaker Craig Harper. A constantly updated, one-stop information, inspiration, education and motivation station. Unlike many similar sites, it is a totally free resource for anyone who is serious about moving from mediocre to amazing in any area of their personal or professional life. With hundreds of articles covering a wide range of subject matter, great interviews with cool people and inspirational video posts, there's more than enough brain-food to keep you busy for hours. Okay, days!! Enjoy.


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Welcome to Craig's site.

Craig Harper is Australia's leading motivational speaker and educator (according to Google Australia). He is a highly sought-after corporate coach and is considered to be a leader and pioneer in the areas of personal and professional development.

Working with hundreds of teams, companies and a wide variety of organisations on numerous continents over the last twenty years has given Craig a unique insight into, and understanding of, human performance and all its variables. Craig has an ability to educate, inspire, challenge and make people laugh all at the same time!

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Renovate Your Life Blog


Monday, September 17, 2007
The Pursuit of Happiness
* Before I start, let me say that I don't have the definitive answer to this discussion (or any); I don't think there is one when it comes to this topic.
Like most, I'm still exploring it... which is why I have chosen to make it just that; a discussion.
An interactive chat.

A group exploration.
I'll open the door on it and you guys can come in and chat.


I would like to know your thoughts and feelings on the subject because I'm sure you're gonna have some and it's relevant to every person on the planet.
It's probably the ONE topic which is of universal interest.
And I know you can teach me and the rest of the group a thing or two if you want to.

Hi Guys.
Hope you're enjoying (or enjoyed) your weekend.

I've had fun so far... worked on a couple of radio stations, spent hours in the studio and had an interesting on-air chat with the principle of a very wealthy, high-profile school here in Australia which is about to start teaching 'positive psychology' as an integral part of it's curriculum in 2008.
Described by some as 'Happiness 101'.

This subject is now taught in numerous colleges and graduate schools around the US (over 200) and has been largely driven (championed is maybe a better word) by a US psychologist named Dr. Marty Seligman. I've read a little of what the good Doc says (it all seems reasonable) and, as I said, spoke to the school principle who is spending sixteen million dollars (that's some school) on a 'wellness centre' for his students (which will incorporate the positive psychology stuff).

The interesting discussion with Mr School Principle got the cogs in my small but curious brain turning.

In a recent magazine article here in Australia (Good Weekend Magazine) the 'science' of happiness was explored (this was the catalyst for the radio interview).
It seems that (according to the article anyway) despite all our stuff (resources, technology, money, education, toys) we're no happier... in fact overall, probably less happy.

Apparently, it's now something we need to teach.
We're losing (or have lost) the skill.
Is happiness a skill?
Or a mindset?
A way of being perhaps?
Can it be learned?

I was amazed to read that depression is now ten times more prevalent than it was fifty years ago... dunno about that stat... but that's what was reported in this article.
Maybe we're just more aware now.
More educated about depression perhaps.
Hmm.

I have some amazing memories of spending time on a little Island in Vanuatu called Espiritu Santo a few years back, where I made some great friends who taught me all about genuine happiness.
They weren't trying to teach me anything... but they did.

No electricity, no TV, no radio, little money, no bank accounts.... lots of fun, lots of laughs, lots of love, an old guitar with four strings and lots of happiness.
Wonder who taught them?
Probably did that positive psychology course by correspondence.

Watch your step, you may trip on my sarcasm.

By the way, I'm not being critical of the program, it's introduction into schools or the notion of exploring positive psychology... I guess it's just a weird (but insightful) commentary on where we are at as a society when we have to take classes (at college level no less) on how to be happy.

Maybe we should just send our kids for a semester of 'Life 101' on the island of Espiritu Santo with my islander brother, McKenzie (his first name).

In the magazine article, the comparison was made between feeling good (chasing or partaking in something which makes us feel good for a while - food, drugs, sex, a new dress) and doing good (helping others, being generous with our time, money, skills)... and which might provide us with a greater level of long-term and overall happiness.

In a way, the self-ish verses self-less debate.

But the million dollar question has to be... what is happiness?
Is it different things for different people?
Can it be defined?
Is it a psychological state?
An emotional state?
A spiritual plane?
A combination of the lot perhaps?
A myth?
None of the above?

How do we know when we're there?
What are the symptoms?
Er, signs?

What if we have all the 'happiness ingredients' but we're still not happy?
Perhaps there's something wrong with our wiring?
Or maybe the 'ingredients' need to be different for every individual?
Maybe there are no 'set' ingredients?
Maybe we keep changing the 'happiness rules'?
Constantly raising the 'happiness bar'?
Subconsciously pushing it out of our own reach?
Self-inflicted misery?

Strangely, some of us seem determined to find our way back to unhappiness.

Some psychologists teach us that... if we are needed, wanted, appreciated, stimulated and loved... we should be pretty happy.
But what if we're not?

Is happiness a four-year old squealing with delight as her dad pushes her on a swing?
Or is that a momentary emotional state?
Temporary euphoria?
Excitement?
Joy perhaps?
And when she starts crying once the swing stops does that mean the happiness has stopped?
Or perhaps she's just a brat?
Or just a kid who wants to be swinging?

Is true happiness something that is (for the most part) always there?
Like that deep sense of contentment, inner peace, satisfaction and calm that we might guess someone like the Dalai Lama takes everywhere with him?
That deep sense of knowing that we are in the right place, doing the right thing?
Maybe it's impossible to be happy all the time?
Or not.

Every religion has an opinion on it.
And also a level of "we're right and they're wrong" in their theology (psychology/philosophy).
Religious arrogance always amuses me.
Seems a little contradictory to me.
But then again, I'm just a simple gym owner.
Not as enlightened as some, I s'pose.

Maybe happiness is the absence of certain things?
Fear, frustration, hate, illness, pain and insecurity... for example.

Surely different things make different people happy.
So maybe happiness is an individual response to a range of varied stimuli?
For one person, a crying baby might be a source of great happiness but for another....
Not so much!

And what about things which once made us happy... but not any more?
Because we've changed.
Maybe for the worse.
Maybe we make ourselves miserable... focusing on what we don't have... rather than enjoying what we do?

Perhaps we don't really know how to appreciate what, or who we have in our life?
Some people suggest that living in an environment where we have so many choices (check out the cereal selection at your supermarket) has led some of us to being perpetually dissatisfied, always wanting more, always looking over the fence.
Always believing that a bigger, better or newer version (of whatever) will make us happy.

Finding misery in an otherwise pretty cool life seems to be a common skill these days.

Perhaps we're too analytical?
Perhaps our tendency to analyse and re-analyse every single facet of our lives inside-out and upside-down has turned us into a bunch of neurotic, self-absorbed, insecure, needy Sigmund Freud-wannabees?

Perhaps all this 'therapy' has made us more dysfunctional?
Maybe we think and talk about it too much?
Maybe I shouldn't publish this article?
Maybe I'm helping perpetuate the problem?
Or not.

Maybe we should spend less time trying to make ourselves happy and more time and energy trying to make others happy... and in doing so... we'd make ourselves happy!
That'd be cool.

Hey, I'm back at the selfish verses selfless debate aren't I?

Maybe there's something in that?

* Okay, I know you have an opinion... get off the fence and let's hear it.

(However, I have a 'no preaching' rule. If you get all self-righteous, judgemental, critical and preachy on me.. you won't be published. Thoughts, ideas, opinions and general discussion; great. Sermons; not great).

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