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About This Site.

This site is the website of motivational speaker Craig Harper. A constantly updated, one-stop information, inspiration, education and motivation station. Unlike many similar sites, it is a totally free resource for anyone who is serious about moving from mediocre to amazing in any area of their personal or professional life. With hundreds of articles covering a wide range of subject matter, great interviews with cool people and inspirational video posts, there's more than enough brain-food to keep you busy for hours. Okay, days!! Enjoy.


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Welcome to Craig's site.

Craig Harper is Australia's leading motivational speaker and educator (according to Google Australia). He is a highly sought-after corporate coach and is considered to be a leader and pioneer in the areas of personal and professional development.

Working with hundreds of teams, companies and a wide variety of organisations on numerous continents over the last twenty years has given Craig a unique insight into, and understanding of, human performance and all its variables. Craig has an ability to educate, inspire, challenge and make people laugh all at the same time!

ryl workshop

Renovate Your Life Blog


Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Freak University (part two)
If you missed part one of Freak University, you may want to read it first here.

So I sit there on the edge of my seat, curious about what might happen next.
I look at my goofy buddy and he's totally into it.
I feel sorry for him.
Somehow, I think the pity is mutual.

The Motivator Dude (who shall be referred to as MD for this discussion) steps on stage to a standing ovation from his adoring crowd.
Mostly adoring.
I'm more.. amused.
And seated.
I receive several disapproving looks from some of the hard-core MD groupies for not respecting their guru as I should.
I don't really care.
One woman with way too much red lipstick for her fifty-something years and way too little T-shirt for her large-ish body actually shakes her head at me.
I laugh at her.
She leans over and whispers something to her friend while maintaining eye contact with me.
I notice that her too-small T shirt actually has a picture of the MD on the front.
Hilarious.

I laugh harder and I make an 'L' with the thumb and index finger of my right hand.
I place it against my forehead, giving her the universal 'loser' symbol.
Mr Perfect sees what's happening.

"What are you... twelve?"
"She started it", I reply maturely.

I switch my gaze to the MD.
He intrigues me.
He looks fit and healthy.
Normal even.
Not sure what I expected but he wasn't it.
Funny... I didn't even know I had any expectation.

He starts to talk and to my disappointment, he sounds kind of reasonable.
I hate that.
I wanted him to be embarrassingly horrible.
And cheesy.
He isn't.
He's kind of smart and entertaining.
I desperately search for a fault.
It's what I do.
It's how I make me feel better about me.
I don't want to like him.

He talks about the myriad of ways that we sabotage our lives, waste our potential and delude ourselves... my gut starts to churn and all of a sudden I have an awareness of my heart pounding in my chest.
My buddy takes a sideways glance at me.
I swear at him.
I feel uneasy.

The MD continues to talk about destructive habits, behaviours and attitudes.
And how we have an ability for wasting time and talent.

He's describing me and my life.
My buddy looks straight ahead.
Wise.
I feel a little fear and anxiety but I would never tell anyone.

And then, in what appears to be some pre-choreographed move, the MD turns, looks directly at me (well, feels like it) and says "if you're not careful, some of you will wake up one day and it will be too late... your ship will have sailed and your time, your potential and your opportunity will be no more... you can bullshit your friends and family... but you can't bullshit me... or you."

"You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"You've known for a long time what needs to change but you continue to do nothing with that knowledge. You spend your life creating mediocre... and then stupidly wonder why your life is the way it is."

"You've been a victim for too long."

"You need to stop playing the 'anger, blame, self-pity, apathy and procrastination' games... and step into the game of life. It's the best game in the world but you can't play if you have your ass surgically attached to the couch... and your mouth permanently switched to bullshit mode.."

Has this guy got a film of my life??

I laugh a little.
I like the way he talks.
Not really what I expected.
But he makes sense.
I force myself to stop laughing and smiling.
I can sense my buddy feels he has made some ground.

I'm compelled to prove him wrong.

A few minutes later the MD is halfway through a heart-felt story when I simulate tear wiping for the benefit of Mr Fabulous.
He's not happy.

"Dude, stop being so negative, get over yourself and listen to what he has to say, you judgemental tool. You might actually learn something if you leave your crappy, condescending attitude at the door."

"But the guy's embarrassing..."


"Have you taken a look at yourself over the last ten years Mr High-Achiever; you're fat, you're unhealthy, you're in debt, you're miserable, you hate your job, you don't speak to your family because they're 'morons', you've never got a woman because you live like an anti-social pig and
you look ten years older than you are."
"Maybe, just maybe.. if you change your hideous attitude for even one day, you might actually learn something."

All of a sudden I'm eight years-old and I'm in the principles office.

He's totally right but being the emotionally-dysfunctional, wanna-be-alpha-male that I am, I have an overwhelming urge to make a joke.
Nothing comes to mind.
I hate that.
My one coping mechanism lets me down.
I'm struggling and I know it.
I'm like the brat being dragged to the dentist with an infected tooth.
I know it's only gonna get worse but.. "can't I do it next week?"

Strangely, my buddy's words resonate.
He has pushed a button and momentarily I feel a twang of regret about what I have become.
How I treat others... and myself.

I do my best to ignore the feelings.

Over the next few hours I hear the term 'paradigm shift' ten times.
I don't know what a paradigm is, so I don't know how to shift mine.
I'm not even sure that I have one, and if I do, I don't think I brought it along.
To me a paradigm sounds like a shape; sort of like a hexagon or something.
I think I heard about them in geometry at school.
"Girls and boys, an octagon has eight sides and a paradigm has thirteen sides."

Maybe not.

I also learn that we're all unique.
How ironic.
I look around the room and we all look... the same.
But I kinda get what he means.

I survive the morning session and make it to lunch relatively unscathed.
We walk out of the auditorium and my buddy is unusually quiet and down-beat.
If that's a term.
I don't tell him, but I've actually enjoyed most of what's gone on.

He offers to take me home early.
I'm shocked.
I feel bad.
A new emotion for me.
Captain Sarcasmo has drained the life-force out of his one friend.

I have a moment.

I experience another new emotion; regret.
Wow... maybe I'm evolving.

"Nah... let's stay."
"I don't want you to stay unless you absolutely want to be here... I'm sick of trying to help someone who doesn't want to be helped.."

Now I feel like complete crap.

I have another moment.

All of a sudden I realise that I actually want my friend to care about me and my crappy life.
The thought of him giving up on me scares me.
I do something new.
Unprecedented even.

"Sorry."

I surprise both of us.

"For what."
"For being an ungrateful, self-absorbed dick."
"Wow.. the beginning of wisdom"
"Steady..."

We both laugh and I feel relieved and happy that he hasn't given up on me.
He gives me a hug.
I'm uncomfortable.

I haven't changed that much.

We eat some over-priced, high-performance, weird-ass hippie food and then head back in for the afternoon session.

I decide to judge and criticise less and listen and learn more.
Another breakthrough.
I even feel a bit bad for making fun of the chick in the teeny weeny T shirt.
Not too bad though.

Again, a work in progress.

The rest of the day is an eye and mind-opener for me.
Once I stop trying to figure out what's 'wrong' with everyone around me and really start to listen to the MD and focus on my own crap, I actually start to learn.

I learn that I am my biggest hurdle.
I learn that I need to ask the right questions; the empowering ones.
I learn that perfect timing is for the most-part, a fallacy.
I learn that my crappy reality is largely the result of my crappy attitude.
I learn that 'success' is less about talent and more about passion and drive.
I learn that every day can be a good day, if I make that choice.
And I learn that sometimes I should talk less and listen more.
Especially to Mr. Perfecto.

We arrive at my front door just as the sun is going down.
It's been a weird, but good day.
I thank my buddy and he gives me a hug.
I almost enjoy it.

I walk inside my house and I am acutely aware of the mess, filth and chaos that is my 'home.'
And for the first time, I understand the metaphor that my buddy spoke of.

I spend three hours cleaning.
I feel amazing.
I don't know why but being in a clean house makes me feel more in control.
Better.
I don't quite get it... but it's real.
I go for a walk-jog in the dark.
More a walk.
Physically, I feel disgraceful.
Emotionally, I feel incredible.
Different.

My mind is racing with what might be.
My heart is pounding with what will be.
I cook myself a healthy stir-fry; it tastes like crap but I know it's good for me.
It's the first time I've cooked in months and the first night in living memory that I consume zero alcohol.

At ten past midnight I put my sober self into my clean bed, in my clean room, in my clean house.
I'm a bit proud of me.
Okay, a lot.
I think about the day's events.
I'm excited about my life for the first time in... forever.
I'm not there yet, not even nearly there... but I've started and I'm determined.
And I will fall asleep dreaming about what I'll achieve tomorrow.

My buddy always tells me that "every thousand mile journey begins with a single step."
At last, I've taken a step.
Thanks Mr. Perfecto.
Thanks Motivator Dude.
And thanks me (I'm beginning to like you.)
Er, me.

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